We started our 2019-2020 school year last week. It’s an odd schedule, but starting in July works for our family. In addition to some bigger calendar reasons to start school so early, there’s the weather and living with a trach. The heat and humidity outdoors prevented Nathaniel from being outside more than ten minutes at least one day last week. We might as well use these inside days for learning. l know one thing after a week of school. This year feels drastically different from our previous year.

Rich and I are ETC trained. In the foster and adoption world that means we’ve taken extra classes beyond what is required for state licensure. Specifically, we’ve taken classes that focus on helping children with adverse childhood experiences, or “children from hard places” as the class creators often refer to them. The ETC training provided a window to understand the consequences medical trauma and loss of family brings in Nathaniel’s life.

The last seven years have taken us deep into the world of complex medical and special needs parenting. Meanwhile, our son who is a cowboy has worked seasonal ranch work in New Mexico, a couple years including sub zero winters in Montana, broke and trained colts in Wyoming, and returned to cowboy again New Mexico. We’ve visited him less than a handful of times, typically just one parent at a time, because tracheostomy and cowboy worlds are distanced by more than miles.